Yo Joan! Move over Karen, Cindy’s in town

“You were only waiting for this moment to arise.” – The Beatles’ “Blackbird”

Everyone needs a personal trainer. And I’m not referring to the trainer at the gym, although this may very well be the personal trainer you need.

By “personal trainer” I mean the person who reminds you about what’s important in life. Someone who gently nudges you along in a better direction than where you’re mindlessly headed.

This may be a person you see often, such as a parent, teacher, spouse or friend. Or it may be a person you meet in passing and never see again, yet in that passing moment he or she changes your life. It’s as if a lightbulb goes off inside you and it’s …. BINGO! Yes! I get it now!

I had a BINGO! recently with Cindy. I wish I could say her name was Karen because Karens are getting a bad rap these days, but her name happens to be Cindy. And what a lovely name that is.

She’s a personal trainer on every level. She helps people achieve better physical fitness through her workout studio but she does more than that. She opens her mind and heart to different body types, ages, conditions, encouraging all with the utmost respect and kindness. It’s an absolute joy being around her.

When we last saw each other, we were doing some weightlifting. I was huffing and puffing by the third repetition. She told me how great I was doing.

I responded, “I used to be able to do 30 of these easily.”

We laughed.

She then shared something profound, as personal trainers often do. They somehow have a way of saying it at a time when we really need to hear it, too. Inspiring the downtrodden as well as the huffed and buffed.

She mentioned that in her experience, and she has vast experience, older women rarely ever compare themselves with magazine models or other beautiful women in the media. They compare themselves with themselves 10, 20, 30+ years ago.

By doing this, they don’t see their current incredibleness. It’s like being in a time warp. They’re stuck in an applause of who they were rather than who they are.

And this breaks her heart because she sees an amazing woman in front of her. Now. Right now. I wonder if these women really listen when she tells them this.

You know it when someone sees the best in you. You can feel it. They don’t even have to say a word. It’s a good vibe.

You also know when someone doesn’t think well of you. Red flags flutter. It’s a bad vibe.

I can’t imagine Cindy ever getting a bad vibe. She’s Cindy!

Now, to be honest, I haven’t seen Cindy under all circumstances. No doubt some days aren’t as spectacular as others. She is human after all. Profoundly and exquisitely human.

Why is the term “you’re human after all” used as an excuse? It’s magnificent to be human. No excuses needed. You’re magnificent after all, you human you!

Heck, I’m sure glad there’s a Cindy in my life. She’s really great. I happen to think we need more Cindy’s around here – no offense to Karens.

“When you plant a seed of love, it is you that blossoms.” – Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati

Joan Budilovsky is a resident of St Charles. Her website is

And Cindy’s in town! Her website is