May is Mental Health Month: Reflecting on Mother’s Day and Attachment

May is a special month for many reasons, but it’s also a time when emotions can run deep. As we recognize Mental Health Month, it’s fitting that Mother’s Day falls during this time, inviting reflection on how early attachment to our mother or caregiver shapes who we are. Healthy child development begins with strong physical, emotional, and psychological connections to a caregiver—often, the mother plays the central role.

Our connection to our mother starts before we are even born. We travel everywhere with them, hear their voice, and are affected by their moods and health. After birth, the way a mother responds to a baby’s needs—through feeding, comforting, and setting expectations—helps form the foundation of who we become. Birth order, socioeconomic status, culture, and personality all influence these bonds, making each relationship unique.

For some, Mother’s Day is filled with warmth and celebration. For others, it brings sadness, distance, or the grief of loss. Some cherish the relationship they have or had, while others struggle with feelings of separation or longing. Mother’s Day can be challenging because no two mother-child relationships are the same, even within the same family.

The reality is that relationships with mothers—good, bad, or somewhere in between—leave lasting impacts. Whether we experienced support, conflict, or loss, these moments can become powerful tools for personal growth if we use them to foster kindness, respect, and understanding in our own life. Sometimes, seeking therapy helps individuals develop the perspective needed to view these experiences as opportunities for resilience.

This Mother’s Day, celebrate by accepting your relationship with your mother as it is, embracing the positive aspects that make you stronger, and letting go of the parts that cause doubt or pain. Acceptance of our lived experiences, with gratitude, builds character and resilience—and from that growth, stronger, healthier relationships can emerge. Whether you celebrate the day joyfully or quietly reflect, the choice is yours—and it’s worth honoring.

Beth Plachetka, LCSW, EdD

Safe Harbor Counseling and Dr. Beth Speaks

76 S. Main Street, Suite A

Sugar Grove, IL 60554

Ph: 630-466-8657

Safe Harbor Counseling