Write Team: Look for the blessings daily

Life is tough sometimes, for everyone.

We’ve all been in stressful or uncomfortable situations. Perhaps you find yourself thinking, “If I can just get through this, then everything will be OK.”

We do our best to cope. The problem or situation is resolved, and we think, “Well, I’m glad that’s over.” Our lives feel back in sync.

Until the next unforeseen issue pops up, and we are back into the cycle of dealing with another trying or tense episode.

It’s easy to become downtrodden when it seems as if life continues to throw curve balls at us. Every time you start to relax and feel good, another obstacle arrives. “Why does this keep happening to me?”

I read the following passage recently, and a new perspective snapped in me.

“We think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy,” Pema Chodron.

Bam. This hit me square.

I am guilty of wanting to fix things and get back to normal. I am impatient and want immediate solutions.

Apparently, the solution is to make room for whatever comes along today and embrace it all.

Life is always going to be messy. Realizing and accepting this is the key.

Pass a test and get ready because there’s another one coming. Problems continue to crop up for everyone. There isn’t a scoreboard in the sky keeping track until you’ve met your quota of struggles and then life will be carefree.

This isn’t a pessimistic attitude; rather, it’s a realistic mindset that everyone has good and bad days. All of us know tragedy and beauty.

You won’t know joy unless you also know darkness. It doesn’t mean we have to be happy when sad things happen. But if we allow unhappiness to be a real part of today, the door is cracked open for it to leave tomorrow. And if it slowly lingers longer than we like, we know balance will return.

We aren’t healing if we are always on edge and pushing away the truth.

Life is a combination of crazy, wild, joyful, and complicated learning experiences. We can’t escape the circumstances that mold us. It’s what we do with all of it that allows us to become our true selves.

We won’t know how quenching a glass of water is unless we first experience thirst.

Once we accept that the stars are not aligned against us and that ups and downs are quite normal, then we can breathe easier and look for what is coming over the next ridge. Even in the midst of a rough day.

Look for the blessings daily. If you don’t see one right now, try again later.

Save space in your soul for the grief, relief, misery and joy.

We carry them all.

Karen Roth is a semiretired librarian/educator living in Ottawa. She can be reached at newsroom@shawmedia.com