“You snooze, you ... WIN!”

That could be an important message on a new poster T-shirt. At least it’s something I should be telling myself.

The old adage, “You snooze, you lose,” still stands as wise advice, whether you’re talking about the last cookie in the jar or that job opening you’ve always dreamed about. But in my case, I’m thinking I need to “Choose to Snooze.” (Sorry, I had to pitch another clever T-shirt slogan.)

I am talking about sleeping, but not the daily prescription of at least seven hours of slumber. We all know the importance of sleep. Sleep is vital. Got it.

My goal is eight hours, but my body has its own clock. There’s this alarm that goes off every day about 4 p.m. after I walk away from my keyboard and sink into my couch. It’s a mental break, but my body wants more.

I blame the couch. It sucks the energy out of me. My head starts bobbing and dipping and the eyelids get reeeal heavy. I watch the same scenario every night as my wife and I watch TV. She’s stretched out on the couch.

“Hey! Wake up,” I say every few minutes, so she catches some of the plot. She is an early riser every day and puts in a full day of work. She doesn’t stand a chance against The Couch.

I fight the need to sleep. Because it’s 4 p.m. The Couch does not win. But alas, I am the loser because it’s not healthy. And there is a simple cure, really. We call it the nap. Even our dog, Tucker, knows the word, thanks to my wife, who is a champion napper.

On weekends, she greets me in the morning with a list of things she plans to do. I’m trying to sip my first cup of coffee. I do not wake up quickly. I half-listen in case I am on the list. She outlines a busy day, but we both know what’s always on the list. A nap.

Mid-afternoon, I hear her call, “Come on, Tucker. Let’s take a nap.” He’s on the bed in seconds. They both love naps. My wife can nap for 15 minutes or an hour, maybe more. She wakes up fresh, alert, ready to go. Then she asks me why I did not nap.

My body wants it, but I say no. And here’s why. I am a lousy napper. It’s hard for me to keep it to 30 minutes or less than an hour. Anything longer means I wake up as I do in the morning. And that’s a dragging, sluggish, slow-motion sort of thing. My words are mumbles. Get the picture?

OK, I should listen to this old body. But naps at 4 p.m. seem like a poor time to sleep. And hey, do I really need to nap? Well, the answer to that is ... probably. (Yes, I did a quick search.)

Experts urge us to sneak in a 30-minute doze. They call them bonus Z’s. The American Heart Association recommends you pick a good day to recharge. Naps are best before 3 p.m. They reduce lingering sleepiness in the afternoon, improve learning, aid memory formation and help regulate emotions. (Tired people are cranky.)

Some tips to help ... set an alarm, nap early, create a sleep-friendly environment, set aside your worries, and think about why it’s important to nap.

Meanwhile, I’m pausing another crisis on “The Pitt” so I can wake my wife. I suggest she just go to bed, and we can finish the TV program the next day.

“No. I can do it,” she says, determined. “I just took a quick nap and feel good.” I am so jealous.

My body begs for the bonus ZZZZ. I am retired. I can nap anytime ... usually. And there’s all that good advice online. I must try, and I know where to go to find the best advice. A good place to start ... The Couch.

• Lonny Cain, retired managing editor of The Times in Ottawa, also was a reporter for The Herald-News in Joliet in the 1970s. His PaperWork email is lonnyjcain@gmail.com. Or mail the NewsTribune, 426 Second St., La Salle IL 61301.