The concept of “the matchmaker” has been around for centuries. But with the introduction of home internet in the early 1990s, a new idea emerged: What if we could write an algorithm that could scientifically find your perfect match?

As this idea took hold, apps like Tinder, Hinge and Bumble became a key part of modern dating. But with the recent introduction of AI, or artificial intelligence, how can we know what’s real?

To help answer that question, I sat down with Dr. David Roaché, an Aurora native who now works as an assistant professor at Christopher Newport University in Virginia. Through his studies in relationships and communication, Roaché is an expert in online dating. And with the emergence of AI, he says it’s become a whole new ballgame.

“From a relationship science perspective, there’s been an explosion of research on AI in the last year or two,” says Roaché. “We’re still understanding the relational implications of artificial intelligence because it’s still early on.”

When trying to determine whether a message is AI-generated, Roaché recommends watching for overly polite language and odd grammar choices, such as the em dash — like this one. That said, AI does have its benefits. If you are using it to write a message, he suggests carefully editing its suggestion to add a more personal touch.

One of the many differences between online dating and meeting in person is how communication changes.

“When matching with someone online, you have infinite control over the messages you send. Because of this, we see people develop strong feelings very quickly,” explains Roaché. “The challenge is when you get to that first face-to-face date, and some of those expectations go unmet, so this date is really important for the continuation of any romantic partnership.”

Singles Can Break the Ice

Online dating isn’t for everyone, but that doesn’t mean you can’t find your perfect match elsewhere. With social mixer companies like Break the Ice, singles can meet in person to see if there’s truly a spark. Owner Jay Kucera first launched the business after noticing a demand for in-person meetups on Facebook. Since then, he and his team have hosted a variety of events across the Chicagoland and Milwaukee areas, including Kane County’s Alley 64 in St. Charles.

At his events, Kucera emphasizes a fun, relaxed atmosphere and recommends coming in with no expectations.

“Most of the people I talk to are pretty tired of online dating,” says Kucera. “Our mixers are a great way to meet people because you can’t fake chemistry, and it’s very hard to tell that on the apps. So come, enjoy yourself, and meet new people, because you never know who you’re going to run into.”

To attend one of Break the Ice’s upcoming events, visit its page on Eventbrite for more information.

Finding your soulmate may sound daunting, but it doesn’t have to be. Your match is out there, so don’t be afraid to take that leap.