Time to think about how long you will live

As we put more years behind us, we start to think about those years ahead. As a young adult, when I might die was a non-issue. The thoughts are more survival based. How can I get through this education process? Where is that first job? How am I going to raise these kids?

As those critical years pass by, one thinks about a retirement fund, or maybe a list of those places he might want to see. Have we put enough in my IRA for those later years? My parents are getting quite old, and what can I do to help them in their later years?

All very good questions, but soon the circumstances have changed. Your parents are gone. The kids have lives of their own. Retirement is here. Income is no longer coming in. So, what do I worry about now?

Now we have a new set of concerns. Is there enough in that retirement fund to take care of me? Should I cash in my insurance policies as the need is no longer there? Do I have enough energy to see those places I have dreamed of, but missed?

Then more serious issues. How much longer do I have on this earth? How should I distribute any assets that I will have at my death? Where do I want to be buried, or my ashes scattered?

As an 82-year-old, these issues have entered my brain more. So, the first issue to resolve statistically is how long I might hope to survive. One can go to standard actuary tables and read that my life expectancy compared to all American males is another 6.96 years.

But if you refine that a bit with additions and subtractions, it can change a fair amount. Do I smoke? No. Do I exercise daily? Yes. Is there a family history of heart disease, cancer or even dementia? How much alcohol do I consume daily?

I was born in 1943. I have buried a number of close friends my age in the past few years. When we were born, our life expectancy was to live for about 65 years. Amazingly, as we make it past each year, our life expectancy increases. In fact, I just asked Google how many males born in 1943 are still alive. The number came back as 80% of us are still around. That seemed impossibly high.

So, I rechecked some websites. Seems that the one that had 80% was written in 2017. Duh. A more recent article said 68%. Still seems pretty high.

I know so many of my age group who have died already. I do not think it is bad luck to be my friend. It must be that we so feel the loss of someone close to us and who is of a similar age, that we overlook all the people whom we don’t know and haven’t considered.

The life expectancy for my year, when made in 1943, did not consider the only war that we might have to serve in was Vietnam, not one like World War II. The polio vaccine had not been invented. Heart transplants, stents and bypass surgery did not exist. No wonder we are living far past what was calculated for us in 1943.

So, with that number in mind, we 82ers have some decisions to make. Those include our later years when we might need assistance. Do we sell the home and move into a facility that is more suitable for the elderly? (I hate that word.) Do we have money set aside for a funeral and burial so that it doesn’t fall on our family? Have I chosen a funeral home, a cemetery, a decision about a wake or celebration of life?

It seems that I should make those things clear to my children if I really care. I do not want to write my own obituary. That would seem to be the height of an egotist. I won’t be there to hear it anyway.

While I was contemplating this article, I came across a column in the USA Today that read, “American women are about to inherit $50 trillion from spouses.” It spoke of the Great Wealth Transfer, a historic passage of assets from the oldest Americans to younger generations over the next 20 years. It then says that kids will have to wait.

It is estimated that between 2024 and 2048, an estimated $54 trillion will pass from one spouse to another, rather than to children or grandchildren. More than 90% of that wealth will pass to women as they almost always outlive their husbands. The idea about the Great Wealth Transfer is that kids are expecting a transfer of this wealth to them somewhat soon, not in decades.

Baby boomers have amassed a staggering amount of wealth. Because wives do outlive husbands, the greatest transfer will go to them and delay any help to the children. Those children often will not inherit this wealth until they are ages 55 to 65, often well past the time of their most pressing needs.

Men generally have been the money managers of the family finances, especially in older households. Often, the surviving wife has little experience in such management, although the younger generation has equalized this management.

Couples should work together on an estate plan that can consider the passing of money on the death of the first to die, not just the second. Then consider the possible remarriage of the widow. What happens then? Scary to the children, no doubt.

My message is that these things should be thought about now. See an attorney, a financial planner or your banker. I am single, so these issues are no longer so pressing. I have no plans to remarry at my age. But for those who do, consider a prenuptial agreement that protects your kids. I may have 6.96 years of life expectancy, but that bad driver coming at me does not know or care about my age.

• Dennis Marek can be reached at llamalaw23@gmail.com.