With a brisk October chill in the air, the familiar sight of soft, glowing purple lights returned to the front lawn of the Kankakee County Courthouse.

More than 50 people gathered Thursday evening for Harbor House’s seventh annual candlelight vigil honoring survivors and remembering victims of domestic violence.

The vigil is held toward the end of October in recognition of Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

While Harbor House Executive Director and CEO Jenny Schoenwetter considers the vigil one of the most meaningful events of the year, it is also a reminder of the immense work remaining to be done.

In the year since the 2024 vigil was held, four people were killed in domestic violence incidents in Kankakee and Iroquois counties.

Schoenwetter said the vigil is a time to pause and think intentionally about domestic violence.

That includes remembering individuals who have lost their lives as well as celebrating those who have escaped.

“Domestic violence affects everyone,” Schoenwetter said. “It knows no stereotype. It knows no demographic. It knows everybody.”

Within the very courthouse behind where the vigil stood, domestic violence is the leading violent crime prosecuted, Schoenwetter said.

Remembrance

Quincy Rose-Sewell, chief academic officer at Kankakee Community College, led a reflection and moment of silence in memory of victims of domestic violence.

Rose-Sewell’s sister and only sibling, Witney Holland-Rose, a medical doctor known for her volunteer work and mental health advocacy, was killed by an ex-boyfriend in 2003.

“Our family and her community have not recovered,” Rose-Sewell said.

Rose-Sewell noted that domestic violence, like a heavy and suffocating darkness, feeds on fear and control.

But there are ways to shine light – spreading awareness, spreading hope and taking action by volunteering and showing up for survivors.

“Every conversation we have, every statistic we share, is a flicker of light piercing the dark – and the statistics are staggering,” she said.

In the United States, almost one in two women and more than four in 10 men experience intimate partner violence or stalking, she said.

Domestic violence incidents account for roughly half of all violent crime calls made to police departments.

“Hope is often the first thing to be extinguished, but a single act of kindness, a listening ear, a safe haven, can be a spark that relights the hope,” Rose-Sewell said.

Honoring survivors

Noelle Fillmore, a physical therapist, pastor at Community Cup Church of the Nazarene in Kankakee, and Harbor House volunteer, spoke of the need to honor survivors of domestic violence.

Fillmore is a former recipient of Harbor House’s services.

“As someone who has walked through an abusive relationship, I can tell you that the darkness can feel overwhelming,” Fillmore said. “A happy ending can feel really far away.

“It was advocates, friends and family members in my life who walked with me and reminded me of who I was that gave me the fortitude to grow and to heal.”

Fillmore noted that ending domestic violence is everyone’s responsibility.

“You may be the person who changes everything for a survivor,” she said.

Fillmore recognized survivors for their strength, determination and “undimmable light.”

“You are not less than because of what you have experienced,” she said. “Courage is not the absence of fear, but acting in spite of it. We see you, we honor you, we support you.”

Shining lights

Maureen O’Connor of Bourbonnais and her daughter Sissy O’Connor of Kankakee attended the vigil for the first time.

“It was really inspiring, and it makes you think about what people go through,” Maureen O’Connor said. “It’s overwhelming when you hear the numbers that experience this right in our community.”

“This [event] is really important, I think,” added Sissy O’Connor. “Just to make sure everybody knows that Harbor House is available in the community, and we’re lucky to have those supports.”

Tiffany DeRocco, of St. Anne, said one of the things that stuck with her was hearing how even a well-educated person who was established in her community could become a victim of domestic violence.

“[The vigil] was really reflective and allows us as a community to pause and to be present for those that are going through things that we may not know that they’re going through,” DeRocco said.

Harbor House

Harbor House answers more than 3,500 hotline calls, serves more than 600 clients and provides more than 10,500 collective nights of shelter per year.

It has provided free and confidential domestic violence services in Kankakee and Iroquois counties for over 45 years.

Services include a 24-hour hotline, 24-hour chatline, emergency shelter, counseling, legal advocacy, case management, community outreach, volunteer opportunities and more.

Harbor House’s final October event will be free Little Spot of Emotion workshops for children ages 1-8 on Oct. 28 at the Bourbonnais Public Library.

For more information, visit harborhousedv.org or call 815-932-5800.