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There’s so much beauty in this world, it astounds me. It’s often simple — the way the sun lights up the blades of grass, the way the pink and white petals of a magnolia tree dance in the wind. It’s often subtle — a quick flash of light in the irises of a friend, the grace of a wildcat. Always, it’s necessary — for what could be more necessary in a world filled with as much ugliness as ours than the way the stars shine through the darkness of the night sky?
Humans can be such vile creatures. Often, I wonder why God doesn’t just wipe the slate clean, but then I hear the birdsong in the trees, and I am thankful that God hasn’t yet. As sick as I am of being hurt, I suppose I shouldn’t curse all who’ve done me wrong. If others had never shown me such ugliness, I may never have been able to fully appreciate the beauty God has helped me to find.
Contrasts are often needed to help us appreciate what we have or once had. Without them, we would take so much more for granted. Every day, we are confronted with beauty. It can be hard to see it when beset by so much ugliness, and harder still if you, like myself, hold so much rage. But it’s that ugliness that can bring out the beauty, if we allow ourselves to see beyond present circumstance. Light shines brightest in the darkness, good cannot be fully appreciated if there’s no knowledge of evil, happiness cannot truly be cherished if there has been no sorrow, and life is more vibrant when faced with the reality of death.
Once I saw only ugliness in this world. Then I opened myself again to God’s presence and love. That presence comes to me any time I start to lose sight of the good, and the pain of the moments before makes the relief and beauty of the moments after even more invigorating.
For some, God is only in churches and books. For me, God is in everything. God’s in the trees, the ocean, the sky .... God’s in a friend’s smile and my mother’s embrace. God’s in what we do for others, and God watches what others do to us. God’s in every earthquake and lightning strike. God’s in the storms and the drowning waves, in the bones of my friend who God put to rest and the tears I shed for him. God is life and death, and God can show us the beauty in both if we allow ourselves to see, listen, and to accept that endings are often new beginnings.
I hope people can find God in themselves and in the world around them. It’s perhaps naïve to hope for such a thing when that requires not giving in to the baser instincts humans have. For many, it’s apparently easier to be cruel when true kindness requires a heart and a conscience, easier to be jealous than to be happy for someone, easier to spread lies than to try and find the truth. But that doesn’t mean the rest of us have to be like our tormentors. God will balance the scales one way or another.
Until then, we need to find the silver linings.
KAYLA COOK has lived in Ottawa since 2012. She can be reached by emailing tammies@mywebtimes.com.