Joliet woman organized blood drives for her 40th birthday, in memory of her husband

JOLIET – Kyla Fris of Joliet didn’t want gifts, cards or flowers for her 40th birthday.

She only wanted to help others reach that significant milestone.

Not everyone is blessed enough to see 40 years, Fris said. Her husband, Scott, wasn’t. Scott was 34 when he died; but during his last 12 days of life, family and friends lined up at the blood donation center to give the gift of life – not necessarily for him but as a way to show they cared.

So on Aug. 25, Fris’ 40th birthday, she asked her circle of friends and family to donate blood in remembrance. Forty pints was her goal. The donations didn’t quite hit that mark, but the friends who were unable to give blood made up for it by donating canned goods to a local charity.

Fris also organized a blood drive through Heartland Blood Center at her Joliet church, First Presbyterian Church, which garnered 19 pints Nov.16. Fris said she didn’t get all 40 pints, but her drives did inspire people to give.

Laci O’Connell, one of Fris’ friends, thought the birthday blood drive was a fantastic idea.

“She sent out emails and texts and told people to keep the over-the-hill cards and the candy and that she would like everyone to donate blood,” said O’Connell, one of the donors. “Everyone else plans trips to Mexico or big parties.”

Eight years ago, Scott – who seemed to be in good general health – collapsed at home.

“He began having extreme pain in his back and chest,” Fris said. “He thought he was having a heart attack, then he just lost complete control of his body.”

Scott, Fris said, had just suffered an aortic dissection, a lengthwise splitting of the layers of the aorta – the largest artery in the body that carries blood directly from the heart to the other arteries.

It’s an extreme emergency, one most people don’t survive. Fris said staff at the emergency department told her Scott wouldn’t make it through the night and that she and the couple’s two young children should say their goodbyes.

“But we were fortunate,” Fris said. “They had some great cardiovascular surgeons. He lived for 12 days after that, so we could say goodbye.”

During those 12 days, the couple’s large family held vigil at the hospital, even bringing in sleeping bags and clothes for Fris. Scott required much blood during surgery. To give back, friends and family decided to donate blood, Fris said.

Her parents, Star and Dale Beeson of Wilmington, donate regularly and encouraged the donations, Fris said. Blood donations helped extend Scott’s life. Fris said she never will forget it.

“It was a bright spot in our whole tragedy,” Fris said.

Amy Smith, director of donor recruitment at Heartland Blood Center, said she never had heard of someone asking friends to donate blood to mark a birthday – as Fris did – but she did call it a “wonderful testament to saving lives.”

Fris’ blood drives came at good times. The supply can run low during the holiday season, when high school and college students are on break and temporarily may stop giving. Smith said Heartland needs to collect 600 units of blood each day.

“Twenty-five percent of our donations are from high school and college students,” Smith said, “so when school is not in session, we count on other community members to meet that need.”

Unfortunately, reduced staff at businesses also may lead to a reduction in employees who are able to donate. Also, holidays may keep people so busy that they may not think to donate blood. Donations also decline this time of year because people may have colds and flu. Heartland won’t accept donations from people who are ill.

So Smith urged the community make up the difference this winter. It’s easy, she said. The donating itself takes seven to 10 minutes. The entire process of registering, donating and staying afterward for a snack and hydration takes about an hour. Donors must be at least 17 years old, weigh 110 pounds and be in good health.

According to Heartland's website at www.heartlandbc.org, Heartland and other blood centers like to keep a three-day supply of blood in stock for emergencies, such as trauma incidents. People with leukemia and other cancers, sickle cell disease and hemophilia have a regular need for blood.

“Anytime there’s a tragedy,” Fris said, “people respond, then we forget about it later. People need [blood] every day, and it really is a matter of life and death. Even if your blood donation won’t save a life, maybe it will give time to say goodbye.”

KNOW MORE

Heartland Blood Center has local donation centers in Joliet, Plainfield, Tinley Park, Yorkville, Naperville and Aurora. The Joliet facility can be reached at 815-744-7966. For information about donating blood, visit www.heartlandbc.org.