The start of a new year often brings messages about change and self-improvement. For survivors of domestic or sexual violence, however, healing doesn’t follow a calendar—and that’s okay. Instead of focusing on traditional resolutions, the new year can be an opportunity to gently reclaim something that may have been taken away: the right to set boundaries.

Boundaries are not about building walls; they are about creating safety, clarity, and space to breathe. After experiencing abuse, it’s common to feel pressure to please others, avoid conflict, or second-guess your own needs. Relearning how to say “yes” and “no” on your own terms is a powerful step toward healing—and it can happen slowly, one choice at a time.

A hope-centered approach to boundaries starts with self-compassion. This might mean giving yourself permission to rest, to step away from relationships that feel draining, or to ask for help without guilt. Boundaries can be emotional, physical, digital, or practical—and they look different for everyone. There is no “right” way to heal.

As the new year unfolds, setting boundaries can be less about rules and more about hope: hope for peace, stability, and a future shaped by your own voice. Every boundary set—no matter how small—is an act of strength.

If you or someone you love is navigating this journey, know that support is available. Healing is not about becoming someone new—it’s about returning to yourself, at your own pace, with care and dignity.

Safe Journeys provides free confidential services, including short-term shelter for people who are unsafe due to domestic violence, along with supportive counseling and other support services for victims of domestic abuse or sexual assault. Please reach out immediately if you need help.

Safe Journeys has offices in Streator, Ottawa, Peru, Mendota, IVCC, and Pontiac. Please visit www.safejourneysillnois.org, email us at info@safejourneysillinois.org, or call our 24 hour support line at 815-673-1555.

Funding is provided in full or in part by the Illinois Department of Human Services.